poll

spruce

I wish I could always be the woman I was yesterday.

After I got settled in at work, I headed for a 4-hour seminar the Forensics department was holding for high school and college students interested in job shadow and internship opportunities. I am going to serve as a kind of "administrator" for the program - receiving applications for the seminar submitted online and orchestrating enrollment. I sat in on this, the first of many periodic presentations, in order to provide some critical feedback on how to improve the seminar in the future. Not to mention that I love learning more about forensics and I dream of someday joining that department.

At the end of the 4-hour block, I met with a crime scene technician and a criminalist to complete evaluations on the students who attended. Back at my desk, I compiled the notes I'd been taking throughout the presentation and emailed them to the Sergeant of the department.

By then it was 2:30pm, so the rest of the day flew by. I finished up some errant projects that had been floating around on my desk and even managed to get plans for a January Scentsy party underway. It dawned on me late in the day that I had promised to make breakfast for the following day's executive staff meeting. I filtered through AllRecipes and decided on two dishes.

After a quick MAX ride home, I narrowly missed catching the bus that would take me closer to the grocery store where I needed to pick up some last minute ingredients. So instead, I started hiking down the long hill toward the store, my legs moving faster than I thought was possible. I was chilly due to being slightly underdressed, but I felt great! Alive!

I soon trudged further down the hill to home, my arms heavy with bags of groceries and lovely gifts I received at work. My two babies, Oliver and Aurora, greeted me at the door (scratch that; they were asleep on the couch, oblivious to my arrival) and I got to work. The first order of business was to clean up the kitchen so I could make it a mess again. I simultaneously did some laundry, texted my family to thank them for the fabulous package they sent, and set out all the ingredients I needed.

For a couple hours I worked on the two breakfast dishes I had chosen: cranberry pecan coffeecake and a vegetable cheese strata. I'd never made either of these items before, so I focused hard on avoiding any fatal errors born of carelessness. I completed the coffeecake prep and popped it in the oven. While that baked, I did all the prep and assembly for the strata, which I was going to cook in the morning. The coffeecake finally finished and I let it cool for a few minutes before nervously plopping it out upside-down onto a pretty plate. Glory be! This was a gorgeous masterpiece of deep scarlet berries made soft by the heat, crispy pecans, and a golden glaze of brown sugar.

The cell phone photo may not do it justice.

I poured the strata mixings into a prepared baking dish and it looked alright to me. I'd never even seen a strata before, so I didn't have much to go off of. I secured it in the fridge and did a little bit of re-cleaning in the kitchen.

...wrote a note to Husband and climbed into bed with The Shining - which has been scaring the bejesus out of me each night. A productive day, followed by a productive, yet relaxing evening at home. I'm happy. The spirit of the holidays has infused me and I'm able to see the good that saturates my lucky life. Here are some grainy highlights, in no particular order (actually, I guess it's alphabetical in terms of how I named the file):

"cats" - (striped Aurora and tuxedo Oliver - best friends forever)

"immersion" (new blender - best kitchen tool ever!)

"jesse" (husband. love of my life.)

secondarily "mexican food" (from Cha Cha Cha Taqueria)

"rainy" (Oregon - the land I love)

gold leaf

Pictorial Webster's: Inspiration to Completion from John Carrera on Vimeo.

positive reinforcement

Friday's work day was drawing to a close and I was awfully conflicted about how to spend my evening. Jesse and I had planned to attend the holiday party for our new apartment community, but when he picked up a dinner shift at work, I didn't really want to venture out alone. Teresa had invited me to Newberg for a night of Patron tequila, cheesy fries, and gossip, but the 40 minute drive and threat of freezing rain were dissuading factors.

I grabbed a long memo from my desk to proofread at home, anticipating a self-imposed lonely night on the couch. I hopped on the MAX and headed east toward home, all the while mulling over my options. The closer I got, the more seriously I was considering going to the holiday party alone. One of the big draws for Jesse and I had been a raffle contest for anyone who brought an item to donate to Toys for Tots. As I disembarked from the train, I decided to go for it. I walked over to a grocery store very near our apartment and chose a Crayola art set to bring.

It was still a bit early, so I went to our house to unpack my work bag and have a small glass of emboldening wine. Once it was safely past the party's start time, I walked down the hill with my donation in hand. Entering the party, I could hardly believe my eyes. It was an amazing improvement in holiday spirit from our prior apartment home. There was a National Guardsman taking toys and handing out raffle tickets in exchange. A live rock band played in the corner and several people huddled around the crackling fireplace.

I walked down the main hallway to a room full of people. One large table displayed an array of appetizers, while another had at least 10 kinds of desserts. Wine was being served at the bar. I grabbed food and drink and wandered around aimlessly, trying to decide how long to stay. I spotted two girls chatting and eventually talked myself into going over and saying hi.

The girls, Sarah and Clara (for real), and I talked for quite a while, when suddenly the raffle ceremony was announced. Everyone crowded into the main room, pink raffle tickets clutched in their hands. Many prizes were up for grabs, including gift cards to a grocery store, Target, P.F. Changs, and Claim Jumpers. Sarah was one of the first to win - a handy Target card. Not too long after, Clara won a Shell gasoline gift card. The female half of the couple in front of us declared a desire to win a grocery store gift card because it'd be just enough for two "Snuggies." Her husband or boyfriend immediately won that prize.

I was left the only one in our trio who hadn't won anything. It wasn't heartbreaking, but I felt a bit left out. The apartment employee announced that they were about to draw the ticket for the final, and most impressive prize - $500 off of a tenant's January rent. She pulled a ticket and slowly read the numbers. 1...4...0...4...9...5!

I breathed a loud, sudden sigh. I WON! I felt like a celebrity as I walked up front to submit my ticket, a camera flashing in my face and people reaching out to congratulate me.

So that makes my third contest win since I adopted contest entering as a renewed hobby! The moral of the win for me was that I should get out more often - talk to people and ditch any plan to take the boring, lonely route. Yay!

happier

As I waited for the MAX train this morning at 7:30am, I took note of the clean, eerie shade of pale blue the sky had taken. All the objects in my sight were sharp silhouettes of dark, dark brown-gray against that palette. A puff of my white breath clouded my view and I was reminded of how hard it has been to find energy during the start of this cold season.

I think most of the trouble lies in the fact that it's dark when I leave for work and dark by the time I arrive home in the evening. I have a mental list of nebulous ideas that need consideration, projects that need work, but there's always a deep chill in the air and my motivation apparently thrives (however minimally) only in warmth and light.

And so I've begun to explore The Happiness Project in an attempt to hone good emotions and achievement of some kind. This project was created by an apparently busy, motivated woman named Gretchen Rubin who, as her website explains, has spent a year "test-driving studies and theories about how to be happier." Gretchen is publishing a book just after Christmas about the process involved in and results of her research. The website provides a wealth of information, articles, and ideas about infusing more happiness into your life through a variety of easy tactics. Today, like every Wednesday, is Tip Day. Browsing tips from weeks past is a great way to find concepts to mull over and thoughts to help you refocus on your own happiness. For example, I should probably reread the entry for November 18th: "15 Tips to Avoid Nagging".

A satellite website of The Happiness Project is the do-it-yourself Happiness Project Toolbox, on which you design and post "Personal Commandments" and "Resolutions," and you can maintain an "Inspiration Board."

Though I'm not convinced that I'll be able to keep this up for too long, I started by posting the following Personal Commandments, which I intend as loose guidelines and wise goals to work toward:

• Be a better wife.
• Worry less.
• Make thoughtfulness a priority.
• Exercise creativity.
• Make healthier choices.

I also posted two Resolutions, on which I track my progress for a very specific goal each day. The titles of my Resolutions are to "Cook More Meals at Home" and "Drink Less Alcohol" and the bodies of these Resolutions contain additional information about exactly what I'm striving for in quantitative terms.

I think at the very least, reading each Wednesday's tip and keeping a few simple Resolutions toward the front of my mind will be helpful. I figure that at least I'm blogging - that seems like a good start toward exercising creativity, right? I encourage you to check it out and give a little thought to what might augment your own happiness in the cold chaos of this holiday season.